I've always been a fan of BMW's cars. For me, German cars have always set the benchmark in automotive engineering, and I had a soft spot for BMW's designs. I had two successive 3 series coupes in the latter half of the 1990s, and by the time the Millenium beckoned, I'd graduated through to a 7 series. They were all company cars, each bought to my specification, but paid for with my employers' money. I'd had the choice of anything I wanted within the price range, but for me, they were the only vehicles worthy of consideration. Dynamically, as well as aesthetically, each was definitive within its class; tight, sorted and epitomising the German engineering ideal. Whilst the marketing men had to take some of the credit, no product could withstand an advertising campaign as relentless as that of BMW, if its integrity was lacking. Design-wise, the whole range was faultless. The flowing lines, low stance, feline silhouette; muscular, yet feminine too; agile. You'd expect the cabin to be the perfect cocoon, and it was. But it was outside of the driver’s immediate environment that the attention to detail really shone. Everything was in synergy - even the components under the bonnet that would never see the light of day. The bonnet was damped to perfection, as were the doors and boot. The electric sunroof opened and closed at just the right speed, at with just the required amount of force to communicate its position. Somewhere in BMW’s headquarters in Stuttgart, sits a man whose sole reason for existence is to find the algorithms necessary to enable the doors to shut with just the right ‘clunk’. To push buttons a million times until he discovers the value to give them the right amount of resistance. The same must apply to the chemist who toils away in a darkened room in the depths of the factory, working night and day to improve on the already perfect formula of the windscreen wash. Here is a chemical that gives off the most wonderful essence when sprayed through its electronic jets to the tinted, heated screen. Whatever smell is supposed to convey ‘quality’ in screen-wash, BMW have discovered it. Don't ask me how - it's screen-wash, for God’s sake; water and something else available through a million outlets. So couldn’t BMW do what every other manufacturer in the world does and send its cars from the factory with commercially available stuff? No, of course it couldn’t, The screen wash has to be like the cars – perfect, in aroma, colour and operation. Who thought of a detail like that? What kind of person is so obsessive? Losing my company-financed BMWs was probably the biggest wrench when I left the City for life as a journalist, although the pill wasn't as bitter as it might have been; I might not have had one sitting on my drive 24/7 then, but a call to the press office could source me what I wanted and for a couple of weeks, I'd have a top spec model on hand to play with, which has to be the next best thing. But then Chris Bangle came along to re-design the BMW range, and suddenly, it didn't seem to matter as much. People fall into one of two camps when they look at Bangle's work - they either love it, or loathe it, and there's no middle ground. Personally, I fell into the latter camp and for a couple of years, BMW and I have been strangers. Recently though, I've undergone something of a conversion. I've started looking at BMWs with renewed interest and the designs no longer seem such a departure from the norm. Maybe it's familiarity. Maybe I've softened as I've got older. But I could no longer ignore the hype, and besides, a commission is a commission. And I'm not even going to try and moan about it, because at the end of the day, even I know that having to live with a £45,000 car for a couple of weeks isn't exactly living with a hair shirt. So when I get back from America, BMW and I are getting reacquainted in the form of a 535d M Sport Saloon. She's fully loaded, with about £7,000 worth of toys and options including a head-up display and adaptive headlights and we have plans! One of the best aspects of freelancing is the freedom. Okay, I could let the car sit outside my office for the duration, and use it for the school run, but where's the fun in that? No, I wanted an adventure. So I've devised one. Myself and a mate will be driving the BMW the thousand-odd miles from London to The Millau Bridge in southern France, a structure that has to rank as a modern wonder of the world. From there, we're just an hour or two from the coast and the Mediterranean Sea, so I fancy we'll spend another night down there before heading back. That should see a couple of thousand miles under the BMW's belt, a nice mix of urban and provincial roads together with some long, straight motorways, which will be just perfect for me to get an angle on what the car is really like. On the journey, we'll have ample opportunity to take in the sights, stopping in places like Clermont Ferrand, drinking in the majesty of the Massif Central. It'd be rude not to stay in a fine hotel and partake of some of France's best wines and gourmet food, and as we won't want to appear impolite, I suspect that's exactly what we'll do. Technology has moved on apace since my last BMW, so as this one will come pre-wired to receive my iPod, I'll fire it up with a playlist of specially selected tracks for the journey, including a few by the extraordinarily talented and beautiful Russian soprano Анна Нетребко. (known outisde of Russia as Anna Netrebko and pictured above) who I've only just discovered. Her voice is notable for having both the softness and flexibility of a lyric soprano as well as the resonance and darkness of a spinto soprano. She also has a large range, being able to sing high E flats and high E's. You can hear her singing Simpre Libera from la Traviata - click the link on her name above, which goes to her offical home page, and the excerpt loads with the page. Millau Bridge and Montpellier on the South Coast should provide some great backdrops for the pictures, and...well, it's a road trip, so the stories will make themselves, really - I'm not planning on thinking about that particular aspect of the gig too hard! It's not one of my most stressful assignments, it must be said, but the logistics of arranging press facilities at the bridge, accommodation, passage across the Channel etc have all kept me busy of late, and besides, it'll be the perfect antidote to my time in Iraq. Expect words and pictures in early May, then.
SOMETHING WICKED THIS WAY COMES
30.3.06 12:25
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(30.3.06 13:17) In my distant, hazy mid-20s, a few friends and I drove a BMW down through France, ostensibly to deliver it to a mate's dad. That was the life. Stopped everywhere along the way, took some hair-raising route through the Alps and gave it a spin around Monte Carlo. I think the dad had to wait for a couple of weeks. |
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pixeldiva / Website (30.3.06 13:51) *explodes in a cloud of jealousy* |
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(30.3.06 14:08) Doc: The dad let you and his son drive his Beemer from here to the south of France when you were in your mid-20s??!! Was he mad, or so rich he didn't care about the consequences?! Sounds like the stuff of dreams really. Two mates, a BMW, and Monte Carlo? What's the worst that could happen? ;-) |
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(30.3.06 14:11) PixelDiva: Is that the green-eyed monster I see before me? What with you exploding and all, I was thinking of pink mist, but perhaps a better metaphor would be Scotch mist ;-) |
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pixeldiva / Website (30.3.06 15:42) Surely Scotch mist would be a disgraceful waste of single malt? |
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(30.3.06 15:47) PixelDiva: Indeed it would; what sort of single malt did you have in mind? |
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pixeldiva / Website (30.3.06 15:55) Definitely a Speyside, preferably older than 15... |
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(30.3.06 16:10) PixelDiva: Hmm, not bad. I was going to suggest a 19 year old Islay, but a 25 year old Speyside would be good too. Back to pink mist then, is it? |
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pixeldiva / Website (30.3.06 16:12) Well if you insist, but pink really *isn't* my colour... |
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(30.3.06 16:19) PixelDiva: Imagine my surprise ;-) |
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pixeldiva / Website (30.3.06 16:22) Well, it clashes with the hair for a start... ... but you knew that already 
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Jennyta / Website (30.3.06 16:28) Millau bridge brings back fond memories of our last two trips around France. Not keen on BMWs though! |
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(30.3.06 16:35) PixelDiva: I guess it does. You started this, exploding like that. Tch! How about you undo it, so then we don't have to worry about the pink mist, or wasting a decent Scotch. On the other hand - if you'd really exploded into a pink mist, you really wouldn't have to worry about it clashing with your hair! |
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(30.3.06 16:37) Jenny: Not keen on Chris Bangle's designs, or don't like the way they drive? And what did you think of Millau Bridge? I've seen footage of it, I've read about it, but it still takes my breath away, both as a feat of engineering, and as a monument in itself. |
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pixeldiva / Website (30.3.06 16:39) Well, technically, you started it with the post. Also - explosions don't necessarily have to be *that* literal, do they? |
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(30.3.06 16:53) PixelDiva: Okay, okay...truce! And no, I guess not all the time. |
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pixeldiva / Website (31.3.06 00:17) Giving up so easily? Tsk. So disappointing...  I have to ask though, cos it's been bugging me every time I've come here to comment... Who's the bird with the big necklace and what on earth has she got to do with cars and driving across Europe? |
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(31.3.06 08:04) PixelDiva: The girl in the necklace is Анна Нетребко, a Russian soprano with incredible range and clarity to her voice. I talk about her in the penultimate paragraph of this post, and her tenuous connection to my drive across France is that her dulcet tones will provide some of the soundtrack to the journey. There's a link to her official website in the blog entry - when the page loads, it plays a recording of her singing Sempre Libera from la Traviata. Hers is a classic Cinderella rangs to riches story - check out some of the info on the web about how she was discovered. I'm just doing my bit to promote her to a wider audience ;-) |
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pixeldiva / Website (31.3.06 09:07) Ahh, that explains it... the penultimate paragraph of the post, which you edited/added to after I read the post for the first time, so I didn't go back and read it, just wondered why the photo was there. |
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(31.3.06 09:47) Mad, rich- yep, all that. He also had an extensive porn collection in his loft, but that's another story. Amazingly, nothing bad happened, apart from the sinister turn my bank balance had taken by the time I alighted in Blighty. |
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(31.3.06 12:41) PixelDiva: See, simple really. My fault for subbing the glaring erros in the post, which shouted out to me for amendment, and deciding to add to the entry on the fly. Don't worry, I've no doubt I shall do it again! |
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(31.3.06 12:45) Doc: It may well be another story, but it's the sort of story that needs to be told all the same! And nothing bad happened?! As in no derring-do, no shagging, no late nights followed by mornings spent trying to chew your arm off after waking up next to a girl who 12 hours before had looked like Cheryl from Girls Aloud? Or are you just not telling? ;-) |
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pixeldiva / Website (31.3.06 13:06) Oh I'm sure you will. It just confuses me slightly when you do. No biggie But really... is Cheryl from Girls Aloud the best you can do as an example?!? |
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(31.3.06 14:34) PixelDiva: Probably not the best I could do but she was the only one I could think of, off the top of my head. Still, I don't know too many fellas who'd complain if she smiled at them suggestively! ;-) |
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Matt / Website (2.4.06 12:30) * drowns in a pool of his own drool * |
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(2.4.06 13:04) Matt: Yeah, I know - Cheryl has that effect on people! ;-) |
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(3.4.06 21:43) It's the fake tan phenomenon that swept that generation. Whatever happened to looking naturally sexy like Debbie Harry or dare I say Stevie Nicks? Interesting you mention Cheryl T - as apparently The streets new single is based on a dalliance with her. I personally would have thought it was Sarah Harding but there you go. |
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(5.4.06 08:37) Mmm, Debbie Harry and Stevie Nicks? Now that's sexy! And funnily enough, I'd downloaded The Streets' new video for 'When you wasn't famous', so I guess Cheryl was in my mind when I wrote that. Sarah is probably my least favourite in the band looks wise - she's pretty, but I don't find her sexy. Like she'd be bothered, anyway! |
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Ishtar (6.5.06 17:08) Just wanted to point out that the main seat of BMW is still Munich in Bavaria (and the production in Dingolfing, Bavaria) whereas Mercedes Benz or more like Daimler Chrysler (and Porsche) have their seat in Stuttgart. |
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AG (11.5.06 01:46) Ages ago when I started reading about your appreciation for opera, I went out to get Sempre Libera just to see what all the huff about opera music was. It's the only Opera CD I own, and it's wonderful. |
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